Are you showing enough love to your career?

On this annual day of celebrating the power of love, what better time to reflect on whether you are showing your career enough love and attention.

Why?

Well, whether you are working in the corporate world or running your own business,  your career is a big part of your life. It must be loved and attended to otherwise just like any relationship which feels uncared for, it will cease to give you back the love, happiness and fulfilment you are working for in the first place.

Here are my top tips for how you can start ensuring you are showing your career enough love and attention;

  • Make sure your career is aligned with your passion and purpose.
  • Invest constantly in learning and development to keep you fresh, ahead of the pack and energised.
  • Celebrate & reward your achievements big or small daily.
  • Do more of what you enjoy and makes you feel positive everyday (it makes the tougher and tedious things that little easier).
  • Recognise when you need to take a break.
  • Plan your time, be disciplined and set boundaries.
  • Surround yourself with inspiration – people, books and your environment.
  • Focus on ensuring you are getting gratification from the work you do rather than just the pay check.
  • Don’t let complacency or fear of change stop you fulfilling potential – step out of the shadows and your comfort zone as often as you can.
  • Put yourself out there more – raise your hand and say more please!

Show your career more love and see how you can thrive and achieve more by leading yourself more effectively to success.

Recalibration for continued career success

Our personal growth is a result of our everyday experiences, insight we gather, the choices we are making and the fast paced ever changing world we live in. With growth comes personal changes. Just like we look different on the outside we are different on the inside. Subtle changes which may go unnoticed but which after a time can affect the way we apply ourselves, can deal with situations, how we view the world around us and how we show up each day. So how can we make sure that we are operating to our best and making the best of our careers if we are forever changing?

My focus as a coach is to help people confidently design, direct and shine in careers they love and can thrive in. A fundamental part of this is supporting people to understand that as they change they need to stop and recalibrate their personal operating system to ensure they are firing on all cylinders, eliminating unhelpful habits and negative thinking and following the most fulfilling career path.

Have you ever got frustrated that suddenly the tried and tested ways of working and thinking don’t seem to be giving you the results you want or have done in the past?

Are you finding it hard to make sense of thinking, perhaps feeling out of alignment of where you are in your career, less passionate about walking into the office every day or finding it hard to inspire yourself to progress?

Are you feeling that everyone or everything around you is to blame for how slow you are progressing; how unhappy you are and how tough it is to achieve what you want?

Then I’d pose this question to you. Do you need to recalibrate?

Recalibrating means taking time to step back, reflect and determine exactly who you are right now, what will make you happy and how you can actively lead yourself effectively to achieve more of what you want and love in your career and life.

Here are 5 reasons why recalibration of our personal operating system regularly will lead to continued career success.

shine a light on your priorities

We are unlikely to be the same person we were in our teens, twenties, thirties and so on and if we’ve not homed in on what is important to us – our core values and priorities – at our particular stage of life. A big sign we are unaligned to our values and priorities is a sense of missing something or a hole which no matter what you do you can’t seem to fill. Taking time to reflect on what makes us tick, what’s important to us and what we value allows us to reset our compass and start to steer ourselves to build a career and life with more of what we love to do and less of what isn’t important to us.

clarity on your career path

Complacency, comfort zone and beliefs can keep us stuck within the confines of one idea of a career. Reality is that in today’s world we are not destined to have just one career. But without recalibration too many of us stay stuck, frustrated and uninspired on an out of date career pathway. When we recalibrate, we take time to explore exactly what excites us, our skills, strengths and passions. Setting career goals based on what is important to us and a personal set of success criteria helps bring clarity to your career pathway which can then be turned into vision, strategy and an action plan to help you get there confidently.

Re-energise

A need for recalibration isn’t because something is broken. It’s unlikely you need fixing you just need to focus on improving and realigning yourself in certain areas in order to function and perform better. When anything has been going for a long time it’s very likely to be tired and of need of a boost to re-energise it. And as humans we are no different. When you recalibrate, you connect with doing more of what you love, align yourself once more with your values and start to focus on using more of the skills, strengths and personal strategies which will make things easier. You achieve a natural boost. The end result is a more confident and reenergised you.

Kill off negative whispers

With experience, we build a bank of personal stories and beliefs which can lead to unhelpful negative energy and chatter inside. When we recalibrate, we take time to spot the helpful personal stories, those that can give us empowering beliefs to spur us on, to take risks and push through fear. We also learn to notice and challenge the stories in our heads which are holding us back, feeding the negative whispers of our inner gremlins and doing us no good. The outcome, a bank of empowering beliefs, ability to make peace with past experiences, recognising them as fact or fiction and a greater focus on a future full of positive thinking.

Identify opportunity for growth

If we don’t stop and reflect on our strengths, skills and situation we are closing our eyes to opportunity. Through coaching, I love it when clients have amazing aha moments throughout the experience. Particularly those which come with a realisation of how much more they have to offer and what more the world has to offer them. Once we open our eyes to unseen opportunities, and with a recalibrated operating system, the freedom of choice and new experiences are the kick start you need to personal growth.

WANT TO FIND OUT MORE ABOUT HOW I CAN HELP YOU RECALIBRATE? – Find out about my coaching programmes here or arrange a chat by booking a FREE no onward commitment discovery session here.

HOW I WORK TO CREATE CHANGE AND TRANSFORMATION

It’s more than just a conversation and coaching sessions, working with me means you get a partner who over an agreed period will keep you working constantly, keep you accountable and ensure action so as to meet your vision and goals quickly. It starts from the moment you say yes I’m in with exercises and challenges to encourage you to reflect, explore and change perspectives. It’s all rooted in my bespoke coaching model – The Believe Framework.

I believe in your ability to find the answers you are seeking, to be able to change your thinking and your behaviour, to be resourceful and to succeed in designing, directing and shining in a career you are love and can thrive in. Yes it’s true I have ideas and experience a plenty, but it’s not about me or my ideas, it’s about fabulous YOU! My role is not to tell you what to do, to judge  or to influence your thoughts and behaviour. It’s my role as a coach to facilitate your own discovery and development, to make you feel brave within the process of change and to confidently step forward with action.

THE BELIEVE FRAMEWORK – A 5 PHASE COACHING MODEL

My magic comes to live as we work using my bespoke coaching model which I call ‘The Believe Framework ‘which i use to help, guide and unlock what is within you. ‘Believe framework’ is a 5 phase coaching model which gives structure and depth to the coaching journey. This enables you to explore, learn, challenge, reframe and make decisions effectively on your own under my watchful, creative and nurturing eye.

Beliefs are powerful, personal and effective in helping or hindering our career change and performance. They feed our confidence, doubts, actions and vision. That’s why they sit at the heart of my coaching model.

Self-leadership is a powerful approach which enables you to inspire and influence your thinking and behaviour when you need to move yourself forward against confusion, obstacles, fear and uncertainty. Engaging the leader within comes through awareness and understanding of yourself, finding empowering beliefs and learning strategies which you know work for you personally so that you can direct yourself more effectively. Self-Leadership creates better performers, decision makers, risk takers, leaders, team players, peers, friends and parents.

Reflect & recalibrate With a past in organisational operations I’m well equipped to understand that systems sometimes stop working. Despite years of doing a good job often they need a rethink and an upgrade to ensure the effectiveness and results we require. When I started to apply this same thinking to me as a person it revolutionised my ability to function as a career professional, colleague, friend and mother. That’s why through my coaching I will help you recalibrate your personal operating systems, to be the best version of yourself and enable you to operate effectively with your current priorities and circumstances.

Tried & tested coaching techniques and methodology my coaching includes a tool box which includes training in other models such as Co-Active, GROW, Solutions Focused, Gestalt, NLP and Mindfulness.

Want to find out more about how I can help you specifically? – Find out about my coaching programmes here  or arrange a chat with in by booking a FREE no onward commitment discovery session here

Get unstuck & manage overwhelm – FREE GUIDE

FREE GUIDE TO DOWNLOAD

I’ve created a FREE guide with my principles around self leadership which can support you in getting unstuck, managing overwhelm and feeling happier in your career, performance and ultimately life. Download here and start to change the way you think and behave by engaging your leader within to boost your beliefs, confidence, clarity and focus.

Lead yourself to success

Want to find out how coaching could be the part of the puzzle you are looking for to help you  step bravely into change and career development – get in touch and book a FREE discovery call here

“Through my coaching with Victoria, I’ve acquired a better understanding of my core values, what motivates me and how this drives my interaction with others. The information has helped me improve relationships that were in danger of breaking down, secured me a promotion at work and has left me feeling more confident than ever before. Victoria’s helped me pull myself out of a rut and I’m now pushing ahead with more energy and focus than ever before – strangely on a path I wasn’t expecting.”

Jon L

Managing Overwhelm

After the downtime of the festive break here are 5 self-leadership strategies to help be effective, less futile busy and to manage overwhelm this January.

Zero inbox policy – Staring at an ever growing email inbox is an unnecessary pressure. Start a fresh today by taking an hour clear that inbox down to zero. Use the 4 D process of – Do it (if it can be done in 5 mins), Delete it (be honest with yourself do you really need it), Defer it (create folders with purpose) and Delegate it (pass it on to someone who can get it done). Whilst you are at it have an unsubscribe detox and stop unwanted emails from clogging your inbox. Then set the zero inbox as a daily or at least weekly personal rule. Go on you can do it and you will feel better!

Manage your own expectations – Often we are worse enemy thinking we can do more than is possible in one working day or worse still believing everything needs to be done immediately.  There are 24 hours in a day and if you’ve got your life priorities in check you are likely to be working 8-10 of those without feeling frustrated or disillusioned. So, get crystal clear on those priorities, be realistic of what can be done in one day and be realistic on how long things will actually take so you can plan and slash your daily to do list accordingly. It will empower you to say NO more often and very importantly you will be kinder to yourself when things slip into the next day.

80:20 rule – the reality is that 80% of your results will come from 20% of your to do list so be clear on what that 20% is (Paretos Principle). Work out exactly where you should be focusing your attention delegate, defer or dump from the to do list everything else.

Remember you can manage your attention not your time – Time will never change it’s fixed at 24 hours but how you use your time is in your control. Limit distractions – it’s not just email and social media, but consider your environment and the people around you. Take steps to stop interruptions and any ‘fear of missing out’ compulsions by being disciplined and set personal boundaries and rules.

Take breaks – Be honest with yourself – If you work non-stop for 8-10 hours grabbing  coffees here and there, indulging on biscuits for energy and running for a grab and go lunch at 4pm which you eat at your desk, will you really be powering on all cylinders for all that time? Nope. Refreshing your attention span is imperative if you want to achieve optimum performance and get more done in a day. Schedule regular breaks – they don’t have to be long but long enough to rest your brain, your eyes and to enable you to avoid unproductive slumps. Don’t forget a proper pause and healthier lunch (refuel your mind and body!). The reality is you will get more done at a better standard if you stop now and then throughout the day.

Don’t forget you are in control of how you spend your time and no one else. This means you are in control if your overwhelm. So lead yourself to success every day through strategies such as those above and you will be more effective, productive and happier and will be able to stop overwhelm in its tracks.

Want more inspiration? Download my new FREE SELF LEADERSHIP GUIDE TO CREATING POSITIVE CHANGE & BALANCE when you join my believe email community here

MY PERSONAL LEARNINGS FROM 2017

Over last few days of 2017 I shared my personal reflection learnings over on my Facebook page which I’ve pulled together to share here. I hope these encourage you to reflect on the year that has gone by, to celebrate your successes and take inspiration from the mishaps and missed opportunities so that you can make 2018 a year of exceptional success. Do follow me too on Facebook for more daily inspiration and guidance.

LISTEN MORE

As a coach listening is a key skill and in sessions I’m all ears, eyes and senses fixed on hearing everything. But outside a session, as I went about daily life I recognised I missed a lot. That being in the busy trap impacted my willingness and ability to listen properly. Awareness has led to positive change. I now seek to ‘listen more’ by being more present in every moment whether I’m coaching or not. To take a breath more often, put down the pen, the book, the spoon or whatever to pay attention to people, places and hear through the constant ‘noise’ of everyday life. Learning to listen helps manage overwhelm and achieve greater focus. It breeds knowledge and learning. It builds relationships. It boosts opportunity. Understanding that listening is more than just hearing leads to greater balance and happiness.

Strategies to improve listening:
– When someone speaks look them in the eye and stop what you are doing.
– Got nothing to do, rather than pick up the phone for aimless activity. Do nothing. Stare out the window use all your senses to hear what’s going on.
– Ask questions, be curious, go deeper. Seek and take time to hear more than what’s on the surface.

NEGATIVE ENERGY

This year I had an amazing AHA moment around concept of ‘negative energy’ and it’s impact on my performance as well as mypersonal and mental wellbeing. Negativity breeds negativity, causes stress and does nothing to boost you. Negative energy has the power to suck the life out of momentum, passion, fun and self-love and leave us exhausted, fragile, anxious and bothered. It has the ability to squash our potential to be our best. Negative energy comes from many sources but the biggest culprits I woke up to this year are certain people, lack of gratitude and personal expectations. So, to lead myself more effectively I have created personal rules, tackled my fixation of perfection and become more aware of what, how and who brings negativity into my work and life.

Managing ‘negative energy’ is hard. You can’t manage others thinking and behaviour or this crazy world we are living in, but you can lead yourself more effectively in how you engage with those negative souls out there, how you tackle self sabotage around perfectionism and how you can lead with a positive mindset.

Strategies to help manage negative energy;
Positive self talk – when you feel yourself being sucked into negative thoughts or being too hard on yourself have a batch of positive affirmations, or simply talk to yourself with words of positivity and kindness to inspire yourself.

Faced with negative actions – then do the opposite and seek to find a act of kindness and positivity to re-boost you.

Practice Gratitude – Start each day reminding yourself what is wonderful, joyful and what you are grateful for in your life.

Choose wisely – it maybe difficult but you need to take responsibility for who, what and where. Surround yourself with positive people and positive activities more often. It may be hard but choose to walk away from negativity, limit exposure as much as you can to negative chat and auras.

HELP!

Asking for and accepting help at work and at home has always been tough for me. I’ve always considered myself and valued my independence. I believe it is rooted in growing up in a small village with limited transport links so I use to spend a lot of time in my own company. Going to small schools and developing the view and the need for only a small circle of friends around me. Being given independence in travel and self-sufficiency before and after school from an early age as both my parents worked. Always earning my own money with part time jobs. Supporting myself through university and into my career. Experiences in life which had contributed to building a belief system that was stopping me from asking and accepting help in fear of looking weak, being a burden to others, losing control and not being perfect.

So, this year I finally, accepted I need support from others in order to function and achieve what I want not just for me but those important to me. I woke up to the fact that HELP was not a bad word. After all I am always willing to help others. As I embraced 2017 with a new set of more empowering and effective beliefs I have sucked up support from friends, family and neighbours wherever i can. Invested in support with mastermind groups, personal coaching, training and self-care. Best of all I’ve turned a corner on overwhelm, productivity and mood swings!

Strategies to help you ask for more help! Stop self-judgement – we are own worse enemies with negative whispers around what other people will think and setting out-of-reach personal expectations.

Say yes more often to help– sounds simple but mastering perfection tendencies, the inner critic voice and self judgement need to come first. Stop think, take a deep breath and assess what you need right there and then before letting No roll off the tongue so quickly.

Be direct – with yourself and others. Don’t make it a guessing game or leave it too late. Look at what needs to be done, look at the resources needed and you’ll probably see straight away that one of those will be a little support from friends, family and colleagues.

Find your support tribe – give and receive as much as you can to empower each other.

THE 5 SECOND RULE

This year I started following Mel Robbins. She’s a master of confidence boosting, helping you push through fears and procrastination. (If you can find time I’d strongly recommend watching her TedX talk to inspire you on how you can get everything want at work and in life). One strategy she created is the ‘5 second rule’ to beat fear, procrastination, excuses and more. The concept is simple (but not necessarily easy!) – whenever you feel hesitation creeping in, self doubt or inertia then you start to count backwards 5-4-3-2-1 – GO. This process helps ‘shift your mental state’, to drown out the inner critical whispers and to initiate a positive behaviour and an action. For example, can’t get out of bed in the morning – start counting and then on Go – just get out of bed, want to have that difficult conversation 5-4-3-2-1- deep breath GO or need to focus on a specific task you have been avoiding – count back and GO and start. You simply go from impulse/ decision to action without allowing space for self doubt and over thinking to create hesitation and ultimately stop you in your tracks.

I’ve been using this approach now for 6 months to manage overthinking and to take more action. And wow it works! You can find out more in Mel Robbins books, website and youtube videos. Worth a look.

STORY TELLING

There is power in stories. The more vivid and emotive they are the greater the power. We can use personal stories of strength and success to inspire us, to boost belief and confidence and totally enhance our impact. The more we hear a story the more we can connect with it, remember it and start to believe it. BUT what about the stories we tell ourselves which we have created based on our perceived memories which don’t inspire us, in fact they do the total opposite. This year I spent time understanding the power of stories we create which we believe to be 100% true which can often be remembered and seen differently by others. I created a bank of my personal stories in different aspects of my career, home, friendships and health. I then spent time dissecting the stories to check whether they were empowering or limiting me. The empowering ones i now use as anchors to propel me when self doubt hits. The sad ones i didn’t dwell on, i spotted the learning and how i can use this insight to inspire me and others in the present and the future. Powerful stuff but even more powerful was what my eyes opened to when i discovered stories which i had not really understood held a bank of limiting beliefs and self esteem killers. When I opened my eyes to new perspective to these stories and challenged them, got them out into the open it helped create understanding around fears, hesitation, procrastination and perceived expectations which were sitting in the subconscious. 2017 has made me more aware of my stories, and as with any level of awareness the power of potential to change is amazing.

So what stories do you have which you could use to propel your success more in 2018 and which ones are lurking in the unconscious keeping you stuck, unhappy or fearful? Sit quietly and under core headings of career, relationships and health for starters write down your stories. Then take time to spot the beliefs sitting within these stories. Are they empowering you or limiting you?

Believe in your best, Lead yourself to positive change and balance. Get in touch to discuss your desire for 2018, to find clarity, focus and action in creating positive change and balance. Book a FREE discovery chat here

reflect to succeed in 2018

As one year ends and another one starts, it’s time to reflect and review the past 12 months to ensure you are ready to reset your personal compass and be equipped for nothing but a successful 2018.

Not only does reflection enable you to gather valuable knowledge it also allows you to boost the positive vibes through your mind and body as you acknowledge just how much you’ve achieved, changed, faced, battled and have grown. These positive vibes will help lift you into the right mindset to gain clarity and focus on what you want to achieve in the months ahead.

Carving out time to reflect may feel like a luxury or you may believe you have enough insight from the year to steer your direction for the coming months. However, reflection is more than just remembering what you did. It gives you an opportunity to fill your personal suitcase with great insight from what you didn’t do, your feelings, thoughts, behaviour and habits.

To achieve your desired outcomes in 2018 you will need to take action. Reflection places you in a confident place in mind and body to ensure you are ready for action. It allows you to align yourself with your success principles, set realistic goals and it makes mapping out the year ahead so much easier and enjoyable.

Here are my simple top tips for year-end reflection.

Give yourself time.

Don’t squash it in to a spare 10 minutes, reflection deserves proper attention. As with all personal development, the more time you invest the more of a return you’ll experience. A good reflection session should be an hour or two then revisited after a few days and weeks as you move into planning the year ahead.

Break it down into chunks

Breaking reflection into chunks will help focus you. Start with each month of the year. Then group projects, experiences, relationships together. Enjoy reminiscing, be curious and dig deep into the memory banks to extract your achievements, feelings, obstacles you faced and how you performed both in mind and in action.

Explore your successes

Too often we enjoy jubilation in the moment and forget to capture what worked and why. Don’t just note down what you did go that bit deeper and capture details of how you did it, problems you encountered, overcame and how it felt.

Celebrate the mishaps and setbacks

This isn’t a time to get caught up in negativity but it is the time to look mistakes and setbacks in the eye and capture your learnings. Ensure that you celebrate as you reflect on how these have helped you grow and improve as a performer.

Create anchors

For every success and achievement you capture engage with the feelings, emotions, words and other senses you felt at those times. Anchoring these success states will engage a positive mindset and drive perseverance under pressure in the future.

It doesn’t have to be done alone

A different perspective works wonders for breakthroughs and knowledge. It’s been a long year – can you remember everything alone? Ask colleagues, friends, partners or engage a personal coach to help capture everything of value and steer you through reflection.

Capture it

Get a fresh notebook or set up a digital folder (whatever works for you) to centralise your thoughts and reflections in one place.

A new habit

This year, use reflection to kick start the process of daily or weekly journaling. Building a habit of continuous reflection into your working practice will keep you focused and aligned to your goals.

Don’t put too much pressure on yourself

Annual reflection doesn’t have to be done before the chime of midnight on 31st  December. Over the festive period it is so important to stop, relax and recharge those batteries. Without a doubt, you’ll have some thoughts during this period which you can note down until you are ready with space and time to focus on bringing it all together.

Focused action and confidence in what you set out to achieve in 2018 will come from investment in reflection.  So schedule time, go deep, be curious, celebrate and enjoy it. Get ready for 2018 because it’s going to be your best yet.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year

Believe in your best

Victoria

DSC_4577 Victoria Walsh is a Self Leadership Coach and Mentor helping great people to be lead themselves more effectively to achieve positive change and balance at home and at work.

Book a free discovery call to discuss your challenges and personal development focus

New Year New Focus – find out more about this new 8 week programme for career mums

A December survival guide from one career mum to another

I love Christmas especially the build-up. I love the way my children’s excitement builds, all the Christmas cheer in the office and I’m one of those who is not dismayed by how early trees are going up, the festive tunes are playing on the radio and the talk starts. What I do dismay at, is the power Christmas has in causing chaos and disruption to my flow at work and at home.

It’s not just the at home activities which increase with a diary full of shows, social gatherings, tree ceremonies, lights up, sing ups and gingerbread house making (whoever came up with that one as something we can all do at home thank you!). I find that pre-Christmas is one of my busiest periods at work for projects, new business, creativity and completion. So, although we talk about quality time with children, friends and family being key at Christmas,  I also believe that maintaining quality at work should also be a priority.  However, that’s when the battles begin. if we want to continue functioning effectively at work and at home in December, to have some level of control, it means managing the Inner gremlins and pure exhaustion which burst to the top whenever we put ourselves into a situation where comparison, perfectionism and juggling come in abundance. Rather than the season of joy it can quite easily become the season of agony.

So, here are 7 strategies I adopt to survive December, to manage wellbeing, quality performance at work and at home plus enjoy the festive season (something which us  mums all too often forget is as important for us as well as for others)

your inferior complex

Any form of comparison puts unnecessary pressure and expectations on yourself so it has to be the first thing to get in control. You may have this in control all year round but Christmas can send the crazy comparison saboteur tendencies into overload. Costumes, how many festive lunches or nights out you have in the diary, what family treats you’ve booked in the run up to the big day, when your tree goes up, having all presents done and wrapped, business travel AND nativity show achieved – are just a few I know us mums will have one eye on this season in comparison to others. Make a promise to yourself that you will judge yourself only based on what you believe to be achievable and acceptable and not what you see (or think!) others are doing.

Be selective and delegate

Personally, I would rather see the children singing and visiting Santa than watching them fighting over who is going to stick what where on the gingerbread house. So, be selective on what you actually want to do and understand you don’t have to do everything. Many of the things we initially think have to be part of the plan in the run up to Christmas can often be parked, delegated or done in a less complicated or time consuming way. It’s the same with work tasks, do you have to do everything before the Christmas break?, what can you delegate, delay or even delete from the list? Identify your priorities and maintain a rational head to keep the perfection gremlin, mummy guilt and the fear of missing out under control.

You have to say NO

All year round, many of us constantly feel a need to prove we are fully functioning and present as a parent and a career professional; always being willing and ready to stay longer, take a last minute business trip, move a deadline, attend an assembly, make rather than buy  -and NO is one of our hardest words. The word Yes roles off our tongue, through gritted teeth and with panic or guilt in the belly much too easily. It’s a fear of being judged for not doing our best or being available plus the fact that we all want to please and support others.

Being able to confidently say NO rather than yes when you need to is key to survival in December. Not just to others but to yourself too. Getting hot on life and not just task priorities, deciding what your trade-offs will be, the impact and the bigger picture is important. Always take time to understand what saying yes really means by considering what you are actually saying no to. This way it becomes easier to challenge or counter requests plus put any guilt to bed.

Say yes!

On the flip side, this is the one time of year which we really should say yes more to social and quality time. I find with end of year exhaustion, the volume of requests, the huge work and personal to do list, it’s easy to keep saying no to social engagements in December.  Then only to look back end of the month and realise you didn’t make time to enjoy the season, to let your hair down, be social and boost the serotonin levels which you know you need to get through Christmas itself and into the New Year. Try and say yes to as many things you can which will make you personally happy and which will help you feel good. Not just the kids or the extended family. Then lead yourself effectively during the period with personal rules on indulgence!

Ask questions

Communication is key in managing my work and home all year round but never so pivotal in December. Gathering insight and arming yourself with facts before decisions will always make things easier. Ask people what they want for Christmas rather than trying to work it out – they won’t judge you at all. If you’re asked to attend a meeting which adds travel, requires a trade off with something else take time to ask a couple of questions to clarify purpose, requirements and flexibility. Asking questions enables an element of control in the decision making and helps manage the personal gremlins. Create conversation as much as possible to manage your time, priorities and your emotions.

Schedule, plan and organise everything

You wouldn’t operate a project without a plan and list, so treat December and Christmas in the same way. Open the diary and block time for all you have to do, create a list and don’t just check it once or twice like Santa, keep it updated and in check throughout the month. Manage the overwhelm with daily lists and celebrate the successes and completions with a Christmas treat here and there!

You can’t multi-task

Well you can but you won’t do yourself or the task in hand any good. Juggling doesn’t mean doing things all at the same time, it doesn’t mean multi-tasking, it means getting the right things done, in the right time and the best way possible. Sheduling, saying no more often and prioritising all help with focus. The other must is to switch off  electronic devices, use personal self talk and sett boundaries to keep yourself present on whatever you are doing in the moment.

I hope even if you use just one of these startegies you can bring things in line, take back control and manage overwhelm, conflicts and performance battles at work and at home so as to enjoy December.

Looking to make 2018 the year of focus, change and effectiveness then why not sign up for my new coaching programme NEW YEAR NEW FOCUS. Find out more here and book a discovery call.

Launching today ‘NEW YEAR NEW FOCUS’ coaching programme for Career Mums

‘We can do anything in life but we can’t do everything’

This is the mantra which powers my own personal Self-Leadership when I’m trying my best spinning the plates and holding down the job of mum and career woman. It’s human nature and our maternal instinct that makes us want and feel that we must do everything and be everything to everyone. As a coach,I’ve made it my mission to help fellow career mums to never feel stuck, frustrated or overwhelmed and to stop falling foul of the misconception of what successful career and motherhood looks like.

Work with me as your cheerleader, coach and believer in 2018 to maximise the potential a new year holds so that you can shine and be super effective as both a mum and a career woman.

Turn 2018 into a fabulous year of positive change and balance. Learn to take steps from the outset to improve how you think, act and enjoy the life you are creating.

WHAT IS THIS COACHING PROGRAMME?

A chance to stop, reflect and recalibrate with the guidance of a fellow career mum and certified coach trained to help you find answers, create positive change and to teach you to lead yourself to success as an amazing career woman and hard working mum.

The New You New Focus – Move into 2018 with Positive Change and Balance coaching programme takes my own personal 10 years of learnings in managing career and motherhood to help you achieve the positive changes you need to be and feel more effective at home and work. To advance, achieve and succeed like never before.

Spread over 8 weeks it combines 6 face to face 1:1 coaching sessions and home resources.

WHO WILL BENEFIT?

If you are a career focused woman, wife and mother who wants 2018 to be the year you….

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My personal strategies for beating perfectionism

If you are like me and fight the need for everything to be perfect everyday then you are probably good at motivating yourself to achieve your best, focused on high standards and have pride in what you are doing. However, you may also suffer from procrastination, stress and it may make you a tough person to be around and have a relationship with.

Here are my personal strategies for beating the pain of perfectionism and to help lead yourself more effectively to success.

8 TIPS TO BEAT PERFECTIONISM

Notice the inner critic triggers – You know those whispering words which feed the need to be perfect are not coming from your true self but your inner critic so noticing the negative chatter in your head is key. When you notice something, you can chose to manage it, to listen to it and to react to it. Start by keeping a track on the words you hear and the times the perfectionist inner saboteur begins to whisper – journalling is great tool for this. This way whenever you start something new or find yourself in a certain situation you will purposely look out for the negative self talk and be ready to manage it.

Self-talk exercise – When the inner critic hits be ready to listen to your true self to counter the negative words with positive and rational self-talk. Bring the two voices out into the open and have a conversation in front of a mirror. There are always different ways to look at things and countering the negative chatter with a different point of view will help put things in better perspective and open up your mind to the bigger picture not just the task in hand.

Everyone is different – Just because something is not written how you would write it or look exactly how you’d present it doesn’t make it wrong, mean it needs more attention or is not good enough. Delegating gets things done but you must accept things may be done differently from how you’d do them. So, ensure that your judging criteria is based on content and not on looking and sounding exactly like your own personal vision.

Priorities – When we’re busy perfecting we’re often not doing something else. The hours rechecking work, procrastinating on which way to go and feeling frustrated could in most instances definitely be spent on something more important. So, understand and ask yourself what your priorities are and decide whether the extra hours spent on ‘perfecting’ a task is as important to you as the hours you miss out on doing something else. More often than not the brain tells you enough is enough when you are clearer on priorities.

Set a deadline – If you know how long a task should take then don’t allow yourself to spend a second longer on the task. Deadline yourself. Set an alarm and tell yourself that this is the point to stop. You are in control of how long you spend on something so develop ways to discipline yourself based on knowledge not perfection.

Don’t compare – Who really cares if ‘so and so’ uses better words than you, could have taken a different approach or looked at something from a different angle? Only you unless you never get something done! If you get the job done, have taken care and attention over the delivery and achieved an acceptable result then your work is good enough. Polishing and polishing in fear that someone else could do something better will only make it shinier not necessarily improve the content and delivery.

Look at things through your own eyes not the perceived eyes of another – When we start to worry about what others think we create perceptions and expectations based on stories we tell ourselves rather than fact. At this point  we are experiencing a lack of Self-Belief.  Stop and. reconnect with your own skills, strengths, ideas and the value you have by reminding yourself of your successes and the positive feedback you have received in the past. Boost your self-belief and you’ll boost belief in your ideas and work.

Use the ideal as a guide not a destination – Aim to get as close as you can to your vision but accept that the destination you have in your head may not be as possible as the vision you are creating in reality. Guide yourself in the right direction with your perfect vision and always reflect on what you are achieving not what you are not perfecting.

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